Idea by Tom Austin Written by Tom Austin
Revised by Tom Austin
The following day Milly and Brad walked to the hospital hand in hand. They looked so happy. They were on a mission to find Thelemondia Briana Banks, also known to her friends as “BB”.
However, earlier that morning when Brad asked Milly who she wanted as her maid of honor he was expecting somebody with a run of the mill name. Upon hearing the name Thelemondia Brad’s sense of humor got the best of him.
“Thelemondia. Isn’t that the patron saint of all brothels, or is that the person who guards the gates of hell?”.
Milly was not amused. She had been brushing her teeth when Brad made his comment and she stuck her head out of the bathroom with toothpaste drooling down one corner of her mouth.
“It was her great-grandmothers name. She’s very sensitive about it. You behave yourself or I’ll let your middle name “slip” out”
“You never asked me what it is”
“That’s because I already know you big falumpus.”
“You’re bluffing. You just saying you know it when you really don’t”
“Have it your way Rosebud”
Suddenly Brad got very, very angry.
“How in the hell did you find out? I never told you, and you never asked.”
“After you started trying to find me I did a background check on you. I didn’t know you from Adam. A girls got to protect herself.”
“What the hell happened to trust?”
“Well if you were a doctor who loved to mug women would you have said so?. I don’t think so. I can just imagine what your resume would look like. You might say you like stamp collecting, working on your car, but you’d definitely leave mugging young female doctors off your resume.”
“Oh, this is getting ridiculous. What if the shoe was on the other foot. How you feel if I had a background check done on you?”
Milly stuck her head out of the bathroom.
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“Now I’m wondering what skeletons are lurking in your closet. I might have discovered you could have been some loony tune that frequented hospitals, liked to wear white lab coats, and collected innocent male doctors to use as sex slaves.”
“OK, I’m coming clean. I didn’t do a background on you. One of my old girlfriends showed me how to hack into hospital records. I wanted to get a better parking spot. Going to the parking level for interns and residents gave me the creeps. It’s so poorly lit. I don’t think the hospital will do anything until some poor girl gets raped or worse. Well, anyway, you were starting to show interest – a very mild interest I might add – and I just wanted to know more about you.”
“So did you get a better parking spot?”.
“Yup. Took me a while, but I got one. Did you know the hospital spends more money on light bulbs than it does for secure employee parking?”. She paused then continued. “So what’s with the name. I wouldn’t name anybody Rosebud if I was paid.”
“My father loved the film Citizen Kane. Just in case you’ve never seen the film they’re the last words Charles Foster Kane utters before he dies.”
All of a sudden Milly started laughing really hard and poked her head out the bathroom door.
“Hey, Rosebud. They’re going to mention it when we get married. Both times.”
Brad went white as a sheet, looked towards the floor and quietly said: “I’m doomed.”
Milly broke into hysterics.
As they walked into the main lobby they approached the information desk which was usually staffed by volunteers. Since this was Brad’s territory he did all the talking.
“Well if it isn’t Dr. Foster. We were about to send out the dogs to find you. Where did you go?” said a volunteer in a green smock.
“I had some personal matters to take of. I’m glad to be back. I was wondering if you could tell me the where I might find Dr. Briana Banks”
A volunteer consulted a computer and looked up her schedule. Milly who standing beside Brad wasn’t terribly fond of being classified as a “personal matter”. It sounded cold and impersonal. But the truth would only lead to endless questions and a very well padded room.
“According to her schedule, she should be somewhere in the cardiac wing. Try the doctor’s lounge”
“I’ll make that my first stop. Thank you”.
Milly pressed the elevator button. When it arrived it was crammed with four people, two women on gurneys and their attendants.
Brad said, “One of these days I’m going to get in one these things and it’s going to be empty.”
One of the hospital attendants got off on the main floor. As he was working his way from the rear of the elevator he found himself standing beside Brad. He whispered to him.
“I been here twelve years and they’re always like this. Bloody sardine cans.”
Milly and Brad looked at the illuminated floor numbers and their feet. The cardiac wing was on the twelfth floor. By the time they got there, it was even more crowded if that was physically possible. Hunting for the doctor’s lounge was relatively easy as this was Brad’s old stomping ground. When they two got there Brad opened the door for Milly.
“My, My. What’s with the manners?. Who are you trying to impress?” asked Milly.
“I’m showing off for the head nurse. He’s had a yen for me for years. Now tell me if Briana is in here.” said Brad
“Oh poo. You’re no fun.” Milly started looking for BB.
As Milly scanned the room she found that little, if anything, had changed. The lounge still had those machines that dispensed something that was supposed to be coffee but all it did was give you an ulcer. Those actually sitting were either talking on their cell phones or hiding behind copies of the Wall Street Journal. Most of those in white lab coats had tenure. Student doctors were almost always dressed in scrubs. And she knew BB favored purple or lavender scrubs. So she looked for somebody in purple or lavender scrubs. Within seconds her snooping paid off. BB spotted Milly first.
“Dr. Milly Shine, as I live and breathe. Is that really you? And who is this handsome hunk of a man – oh, Dr. Foster? I didn’t know it was you. I meant to say-”
“Say, I have an idea. Why don’t we, you, Milly, and I go down to the food court and get some real food to eat and drink and talk.”
It was then BB noticed the ring on Milly’s finger. She let out the loudest squeal of delight the lounge had ever heard.
“I always wondered which one of us was going to get snagged first. Next stop the food court. And I want details, juicy details!”
Down in the food court, BB admired the ring while Brad was busy filling their orders. Milly was very happy to show off her ring. When Brad returned Milly wasted no time.
“Brad and I are getting married in two weeks and I was wondering, hoping really, if you’d be my maid of honor?”.
“Try and stop me. Now, who are the others?”
“We want a really small wedding. Nothing really elaborate, so it’ll just be you.”
Brad butted in. “I think this is the part of the conversation where I make myself scarce. I’ll be back in -” He looked at Milly.
“One hour,” said Milly.
“Like I was saying we just want to get married. It’s a long story but I’ll give you the short version. Remember when we had that really strange patient we couldn’t do any tests on?”
“Well, I became ill. I lost all interest in medicine. And Brad looked for me for months. After he found me he lost his apartment due to a condo conversion. No suitable apartments were available at that time so I asked him to move in with me. We’ve been together for months. Feelings grew, emotions grew. Now we want to get married. It’s that simple.”
BB wanted to know more. “I don’t mean to be nosy, but this isn’t a rush wedding is it?”
“Of course not. We’re not –” Milly corrected herself.
“We simply want to be married. I need a maid of honor, and I want that person to be you.”
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